greg rolnick
father • writer • hockey player


THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 22, 2007
HNA TIER 3 FALL/WINTER LEAGUE
LOS PHANTASMOS vs. GRIM REAPERS

Los Phantasmos 7– Grim Reapers 4

BENSENVILLE, IL – In a game that only add more fuel to the fire to a new HNA Chicago rivalry, Los Phantasmos got the best of the Grim Reapers during a highly-contested match.

Offensive powerhouse, Ross “My name ain’t Earl” Gerbasi lead the way with four (yes, four) goals, and even drew the most interesting heckle of the season. After one of his trademark, jaw-dropping plays, the ‘Reapers Mike Bachenberg tried to goad Gerbasi by calling him, “white trash.” Now, as we all know, the main difference between white trash and rednecks is that a redneck has a job. Since this intrepid reporter can vouch for Mr. Gerbasi’s employment status, the taunt rang remarkably hollow. Heck, the Los Phantasmos bench was also curious as to how many white trash (or redneck) hockey players were even out there to begin with. Nonetheless, Bachenberg was given full credit for his originality and eloquent turn of phrase.

The other Phantasmos adding to the scoring onslaught were Josh “Mama didn’t love me” Tallo, Sean “They call me the breeze” Tang, and Keith “All my exes live in south Buffalo” Hales (who converted on the power play).

GAME NOTES: Los Phantasmos were out shot by the Grim Reapers 32-30; LP went 1 for 5 on the PP and 2 for 3 on the PK; Gerbasi’s fourth goal was also the game winner; Greg “Southern born and bred (except during Passover, when he’s Southern born and unleavened bread)” Rolnick was forced to miss the game, but has graciously offered to help school Bachenberg in the finer points of country-fried hockey taunting to help him in his future trash-talking endeavors.


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