five more minutes, mom
Sleep. Everyone and their infant is telling us these days to start stocking up on sleep, as once Dr. Rosenberg gets here, we'll be as sleep-deprived as a product tester for Jolt cola back in the '80s.
I'm not really that good when deprived of my rest, so this should all be very interesting. However, my real question is: Just where am I supposed to be stocking up all of this time sawing logs? Do I store it in some secret room in the new house? And how do I access it when necessary? See, no one really explains this part, they just smile and say things like, "Sleep now, 'cause you'll never sleep again once the baby gets here." Cheery stuff, really.
Now, while Overboard is doing an admirable job of existing without her daily coffee fix, I've actually been somewhat caffeine-adverse since college. No coffee, and the occasional soda once in a blue moon for 'ol Evenkeel. Shocked? Meh.
See, back in college, I came up with an ingenious plan. If I cut caffeine out of my diet, I would make it easier to really zap myself into action when necessary. Hence, when I needed to pull an all-night editing session in the film lab, I just grabbed one cup o' joe with a couple of sugars, and, "BAM!" I was wired for hours. Over time, I just lost my taste for soda, and I never really like coffee all that much anyways, so no big deal. But that brings me to life post-Rosenberg's arrival.
If all of this sleep-deprivation really kicks my ass the way everyone is warning me it will, does that mean I'll be forced to embrace the evil Starbucks god? I sure as hell hope not, but I have noticed that the morning after a late hockey game, I'm pretty sluggish, and have even found myself drinking a Coke or two at work to try and keep my eyes open during morning meetings. Which stinks, because Coke is great going down, but leaves that "blech" taste in your mouth afterwards...sort of like coffee. Oh, what's a sleepy copywriter to do?
So, here's my plan: No caffeine addictions. Instead, I'll just haggle a deal with the good doctor at an early age: The doctor sleeps like a champ now, and he/she can have a hoverboard at age 10, just like in "Back To The Future Part II." Now I just need to get on the phone to the R&D department at Mattel and make sure they're not sleeping on the job over there. After all, I've got some serious sleep of my own at stake here...
I'm not really that good when deprived of my rest, so this should all be very interesting. However, my real question is: Just where am I supposed to be stocking up all of this time sawing logs? Do I store it in some secret room in the new house? And how do I access it when necessary? See, no one really explains this part, they just smile and say things like, "Sleep now, 'cause you'll never sleep again once the baby gets here." Cheery stuff, really.
Now, while Overboard is doing an admirable job of existing without her daily coffee fix, I've actually been somewhat caffeine-adverse since college. No coffee, and the occasional soda once in a blue moon for 'ol Evenkeel. Shocked? Meh.
See, back in college, I came up with an ingenious plan. If I cut caffeine out of my diet, I would make it easier to really zap myself into action when necessary. Hence, when I needed to pull an all-night editing session in the film lab, I just grabbed one cup o' joe with a couple of sugars, and, "BAM!" I was wired for hours. Over time, I just lost my taste for soda, and I never really like coffee all that much anyways, so no big deal. But that brings me to life post-Rosenberg's arrival.
If all of this sleep-deprivation really kicks my ass the way everyone is warning me it will, does that mean I'll be forced to embrace the evil Starbucks god? I sure as hell hope not, but I have noticed that the morning after a late hockey game, I'm pretty sluggish, and have even found myself drinking a Coke or two at work to try and keep my eyes open during morning meetings. Which stinks, because Coke is great going down, but leaves that "blech" taste in your mouth afterwards...sort of like coffee. Oh, what's a sleepy copywriter to do?
So, here's my plan: No caffeine addictions. Instead, I'll just haggle a deal with the good doctor at an early age: The doctor sleeps like a champ now, and he/she can have a hoverboard at age 10, just like in "Back To The Future Part II." Now I just need to get on the phone to the R&D department at Mattel and make sure they're not sleeping on the job over there. After all, I've got some serious sleep of my own at stake here...
posted by Dr. Overboard and Prof. Evenkeel at 10:33 AM
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